“And don’t fight anymore …” (part 2)
Is there a way out? – First of all, do not be nervous, as this is the problem of most two-year-olds. -l The baby has begun a new period of development and, as a result, outbreaks of aggression. – When you want to get angry and even punish the aggressor, try not to. This can cause a neurotic reaction or even greater aggression. If another baby came to visit you, and your child does not let him play his toys, then no matter how embarrassing you are, do not try to take them away by force and do not shame him – this will only strengthen the possessive feelings of the crumbs. – Try to let the children solve their problems themselves, but within certain limits. Small fights with a push and a squeal are quite acceptable when the kids learn to communicate. – If a child is too actively attacking or taking away toys from others, it is possible to temporarily limit his communication with children, since this is still the time of parallel games. By about three years old, the baby begins to enjoy the company of friends and share his toys. – Well, if you are an experimenter by nature and not cowardly, you can provoke your child’s communication with a more aggressive peer or older children who can already fend for themselves. Then he will quickly understand how unpleasant it is to be in the role of an attacker, and in his mind a negative experience will be fixed, on which it will be possible to rely on in the future. – And the main recipe is switching and distraction. Of course, this is much harder for you than the direct reaction – “aggression to aggression”, and here you need to change yourself in something. But you are no longer a child and know how to control your emotions. Connect your imagination and ingenuity and try different options. Start with the simplest toy exchange. You can surprise your child with your non-standard behavior, for example, suddenly bend down, pick something up from the ground and throw it far away or put it in your pocket. – Moms and dads, transfer clarification of relations with each other “for later” – when the child is not around. By the way, with a cold head, you will be more consistent in your arguments. – Limit your baby to watch TV to 15 minutes per day. And let it not be the movie that you want to see. Cartoons (though also not all) and children’s programs are still a more suitable sight for our children. A slide projector is not a dinosaur, a thing of the past, but a good way to entertain a child without worrying about his eyesight. – Love, patience and … humor are indispensable components of success in passing the first difficult period in the life of your baby. “And console yourself with the fact that this period is passing, this is just part of the path that all children follow.” And a certain dose of aggression is necessary for your baby to live in this world. Is aggressive always bad? Before I faced this problem face to face, watching aggressive kids on the street or in the store, I was annoyed at their parents that they were not able to raise and control their children. Only now I realized that it was not only the educational talents of adults. Maybe the so-called aggressive children are just impulsive, excitable children or extroverts, and their aggression is an overabundance of energy that takes such a form, since in another way they still cannot express themselves? After all, aggressive is not only naughty and resisting, but it is also enterprising and active, it is not only closed and hostile, but also proactive. And the problem is not to eradicate aggressiveness, but to control it and direct it in the future to creation.