Say thank you, otherwise it will be worse ...
I did not notice how another year flew by and my daughter Yulia was three. Literally in a matter of days, my flexible and good-natured child turned into an imperious…

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Etiquette from an early age (part 2)
Do not forget to praise him. Seryozha was so excited by the upcoming excursion to the zoo that he flew out the door, pushing the teacher away and knocking the…

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Game therapy and fairy tale therapy in the work of a child psychologist (part 2)
Another option for playing psychotherapy is to play a plot. The plot in question should resemble the real story that the child is experiencing. For example, if a girl feels…

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How to grow a successful person?

How often do we parents think about what we can give our children? It would seem that everything is obvious – good living conditions, proper nutrition, decent education … But is this enough for our child to grow up successful? We cannot determine the future of our child for him. Even if we make every effort to provide it financially, buy an apartment, provide a solid bank account, we cannot be sure that he will be happy in adulthood. We cannot put a material straw for all occasions, but we can help him grow into a successful person. Let’s see who can be considered successful? Rich man? A famous actor? Great athlete? Psychologist Nadezhda Vladislavova writes: “A successful person greets every morning with joy, he wants to wake up, live, work, love. If someone wakes up without pleasure, he might need to think: what am I doing wrong and what can I do right now to change this. ” Consider this option: if a person accepts the so-called “collective” picture of the world, dissolves in the crowd, becomes like everyone else, lives like “everyone lives”, can he be considered successful and happy? For some, this option is not bad at all, why not? The usual quiet life of an average person. But all the same, people who were able to get off the straight line of “ordinary life” are considered successful, doing something more interesting than everyone else. Moreover, the option, when a person has left the standard orbit and lives quite “unusual”, contrasting himself with society, also cannot be called absolutely successful. A successful person, as a rule, brings something new, interesting to the world, but at the same time he is quite organic in society, he feels comfortable and confident in communicating with people, his environment only helps him realize his dreams and aspirations. Its main feature is the ability to enjoy life, he is happy every minute of his life, all his problems are not a reason to be upset, but another opportunity to prove himself. How to grow a successful person? How to make sure that after many years our children not only please us with their professional successes or a wonderful family, but also so that we feel that the dearest and closest person is really happy? Parents should begin to solve this problem from the birth of the child, since it is precisely the first years of life that lay the model of the world order for the baby. It is naive to believe that children do not notice anything. On the contrary, voluntarily or involuntarily, and the child observes everything! The child identifies himself with the parent of his gender and notes the features of the relationship to this parent. Suppose a mother in the family positions herself as the head of the family, allows herself to treat her dad like an unreasonable child, and dad obeys and follows the instructions. What conclusions will the baby draw? Of course, he will consider such a model of relations to be the only true one, because in the first years the life of parents is the whole world for the child. Another problem that children often notice and parents do not notice, but which leaves an indelible imprint on the child’s life, is when the words of the parents diverge from the deed. Suppose you scold a child for eating sweets, telling horror stories about caries, and you eat sweets without stopping. Or, for example, you tell us that lying is ugly, and you yourself are deceiving a spouse or a child, even if for trifles, without noticing it yourself. Be sure, the child will notice everything, and such contradictions of words and deeds can destroy his inner world. We examined the negative aspects in our behavior that destroy the inner world of our child. But what can we do to help him become successful? The article “Anatomy of Success” from the center “Coast of Hope” noted: one of such powerful foundations can be pride in parents. Agree, there will always be a reason to express admiration to the native person: “Still, your mother is a wonderful hostess!”, “How wonderful your dad sings!” The child will not only feel proud of the parent, but also take this compliment at his own expense, because he’s mom’s and dad’s blood! What else can we do? For example, do not blame! It is impossible to seriously think that the reaction of the child, who is constantly put as an example of other children, will be positive. “Look at Masha, she’s only six years old, and she’s already reading it like that!” Maybe it makes sense to talk about the perspectives that reading ability opens up so that the child himself gets this idea on fire? Do not be afraid to admit that you were wrong, it will not kill your authority in the eyes of the child, but it will prove once again that it is fearless to make mistakes, it is much worse when you are being treated unfairly. Support your children, be friends with them, be honest with yourself, and the result will not slow down. And the more successful people in the world, the brighter and more interesting life will be for all of humanity.

 

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